Melancholy



I glimpsed my melancholy in the mirror
The sadness of my spirit impossible to hide
I go through the motions everyday
Trying to push back thoughts of you
Even happy memories of my children make me want to cry
Those moments far away and gone

I meet with a friend and I slip off the sadness
Like a black slip sliding down my naked body
There is sliver of happiness under that layer of gloom
For a moment I am  present and alive
I enjoy dinner and a drink
And keep my grief a secret

I pick up my cloak of dispiritedness
And numb myself with distraction
Doomscrolling on my phone
Searching for a hit of dopamine
Mindless I watch television to avoid my feelings

The next day my melancholy greets me again
Hello old friend, I see the void in your eyes
I take my sorrow for a walk
The tallest of trees welcome me in their canopy
The spirit of the forest absorbs my misery
I want to live here forever

I have become intimidate  with my melancholy
We have become comfortable companions
As long he allows me other partners
I need a sordid love affair with joy, love, and forgiveness
I play some happy music
And enjoy my liaison with pleasure

Don’t worry melancholy I’ll come back home to you

About this poem

Feeling a bit sad lately due to the death of a friend but I'll recover. I just need a minute to feel my grief

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Written on May 16, 2023

Submitted by Kaytee on May 16, 2023

Modified by Kaytee on May 16, 2023

1:09 min read
285

Quick analysis:

Scheme AXXBXX CDXXXX CXXXX XXXDDA DXXCXA B
Closest metre Iambic pentameter
Characters 1,193
Words 232
Stanzas 6
Stanza Lengths 6, 6, 5, 6, 6, 1

Kaytee

New poet working on regaining myself more…

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Discuss the poem "Melancholy" with the community...

15 Comments
  • Giselavigil
    I read intimate also and I love the reason you didn’t change it. Can truly identify with your words. Thanks for sharing!
    LikeReply2 months ago
  • karlcfolkes
    This is a wonderful ‘confessional’ poem. The Freudian slip in the fifth stanza of your poem ( “I have become intimidate with my memory”) is quite revealing. Perhaps you meant to write “intimate with” or even unconsciously psychologically, “intimidated by.” Either way, both readings portray the melancholy of the poem. Lovely! 
    LikeReply2 months ago
    • Kaytee
      thanks so much for your feedback. It was a Freudian slip but I think I’ll keep it as for now. A happy or rather not so happy (given the the subject) mistake :)
      LikeReply2 months ago
  • alanswansea18
    I love this poem it has a lot of feeling and I love true poems. Not the fake ones
    LikeReply2 months ago
  • TortillasAreNotBiceps
    Just revisiting a friend. Am I wrong or is there a typo in this line: "I have become intimidate with my melancholy"
    LikeReply9 months ago
    • Kaytee
      there is a typo. It should be intimate but if I change it I lose all the wonderful feedback. So I’m stuck with bad grammar or losing comments. Ugh
      LikeReply 19 months ago
    • lovingempath
      If it matters...I read it as 'intimate' :)
      LikeReply 19 months ago
    • Kaytee
      thanks, that does help :)
      LikeReply 19 months ago
    • lovingempath
      I think I just knew what you were thinking. (That makes us 'poetically second or third cousins' I think) I'll be expecting an invitation for Thanksgiving dinner this year :)
      LikeReply 19 months ago
    • Kaytee
      haha, you are totally welcome to attend Thanksgiving. I make a pretty awesome Cajun stuffing.
      LikeReply 19 months ago
    • TortillasAreNotBiceps
      Ah, okay. I just wanted to make sure it wasn't something you missed. I wasn't being a grammar Nazi because I know you know the difference. God knows I'm the king of typos to an aggravating end. 
      LikeReply 19 months ago
  • Teril
    You have the courage to look in the mirror, and to return again and again. This maps your process of becoming "intimate' with your melancholy (not "intimidating" it - although this is a great Freudian slip - you are much too gentle to take that route...) 
    LikeReply9 months ago
    • Kaytee
      Thanks so much. I do think intimate works much better. It does take courage to look in the mirror. I appreciate your feedback.
      LikeReply9 months ago
  • karlcfolkes
    Don’t do any editing. Keep it that way as your internal genius of Psyche working on your behalf providing your readers with intriguing poetic ambiguity.
    LikeReply 19 months ago
    • Kaytee
      Thanks!!
      LikeReply9 months ago
  • cokerrogers
    Wonderful words . I can relate. Was just thinking about a midnight stroll myself
    LikeReply9 months ago
    • Kaytee
      thanks so much! I hope you enjoyed your stroll.
      LikeReply9 months ago
  • karlcfolkes
    Have you noticed the apparent ‘Freudian Slip’ in the first line of the fifth stanza of your poem which reads as follows: “I have become intimidate with my melancholy.” Was that intentional? Did you want to write “intimidated by” or perhaps “intimate with.” Added to the intriguing mystery is your reference to a ‘slip’ in the first two lines of the second stanza, referring to “slip off the sadness like a black slip…” in any event your “Melancholy” poem is artistically rich and metaphorically captivating. I sense genius at work. 
    LikeReply 19 months ago
    • Kaytee
      I wish I was clever enough to make the "slip" intentional but it was a typo. I meant to say "intimate with." If I edit it I'll lose all the wonderful feedback from my fellow poets so I will likely leave it alone and let it be intriguing :) Thanks so much for you kind words. 
      LikeReply 19 months ago
  • Philipo
    Fine work. Saw myself in some lives there. Good music and a good documentary will always challenge melancholy but the winner is not always clear.
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Kaytee
      Thanks so much! I will enjoy some good music today to beat the blues.
      LikeReply10 months ago
  • lovingempath
    This is a very powerful poem Keytee! And it flows beautifully from beginning to end; without any stumbling blocks. I love your candid visuals of temporary escape, but your honesty about your intimate relationship with melancholy is what grabbed me the most. I think melancholy is what drives most poets to write: At least for myself it does; and sometimes I have to force myself into a different realm of existence. You put it beautifully with your 'sordid love affair' stanza and then you wrap the entire poem up with the perfect closing line. "Don't worry melancholy I'll come back home to you". This is as perfect as it comes, and I consider it a masterpiece. Bravo! 
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Kaytee
      thanks so much! That is high praise coming from you. I love your work. It's so validating to know that others find inspiration also in melancholy. I think it can drive us to write and then writing heals us as we do it. I am on that healing journey. I need to figure out how to write about happiness when it creeps in from time to time. Thanks again! 
      LikeReply 110 months ago
    • lovingempath
      Thank you Kaytee! And when you're able to compose a 'happy' poem, I'll take tips from you and try composing one myself. When I'm feeling joy or happiness, I usually just want to 'live' those moments and don't need to express them through words. But it would be so refreshing to read something that lifted my spirits to that level :). 
      LikeReply 210 months ago
  • Symmetry58
    You are nothing short of brilliant, K. I mean it. Your mind is truly something to behold. I absolutely adore your style and thought process. Apologies for my recent absence as I needed a mental sabbatical ironically enough in light of the above brilliance. ;-) 
    LikeReply10 months ago
    • Kaytee
      I’m glad you are back. I understand needing to take a mental health break from time to time. I do appreciate your feedback back. It means so much!
      LikeReply 110 months ago
  • karlcfolkes
    We all have that inner protective “Self” within us which psychologists call “the psyche” and theologians refer to as “The Holy Spirit.”
    LikeReply 110 months ago
  • karlcfolkes
    Dear Kaytee,

    The “Self” you seek to regain is, like your shadow, the most intimate part of your innermost being, and therefore your comforter, always ready to lift you up, lighten your burden, and ease your melancholy. It is that Self that is your divine spiritual image, encouraging you to express yourself through poetry and share your sentiments with others. You are truly blest, for you are not alone, having an intimate companion (your “soulmate”) to guide you. Peace be with you. 
    LikeReply10 months ago
    • Kaytee
      thanks so much for your feedback. I love the idea of my "self" being a divine spiritual image. encouraging me. Also, I love your poetry.
      LikeReply10 months ago
  • AIDA
    Wow! This poem is deeply moving and beautifully written. You have clearly captured the complexity of dealing with sadness, and the ways we try to cope with it. I love how you describe slipping off the sadness like a black slip - it's such a vivid image that really brings the emotion to life. Your use of nature is also very effective, with the forest absorbing the misery and the tall trees welcoming you in their canopy.

    One suggestion for improvement might be to add more details about the happy moments you long for. What specific memories do you miss? What would it feel like to truly immerse yourself in joy, love, and forgiveness? The more you can paint a picture of what you're striving for, the more powerful the poem will be.

    Overall, this is a wonderful poem that really resonated with me. Thank you for sharing it!
     
    LikeReply 110 months ago
  • dougb.19255
    Slipping often the dark underthings of gloom. Nice image. BUT YOU DO NOT HAVE TO POSSESS THS AFFLICTION. Use your mouth right. Take hope from the promises and inclinations of our merciful, loving Heavenly Father. Am I a one way with Jesus guy.? Most definitely. No other way to fly. Read John’s Gospel chapter 14. Call me narrow minded. I don’t care. 
    LikeReply10 months ago
    • Kaytee
      Thanks for your input. I'll check out that passage.
      LikeReply10 months ago

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"Melancholy" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 Mar. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/159545/melancholy>.

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