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Rate this poem:5.0 / 2 votes
The holster I wore was invisible, that's the way Satan wanted it because that's where he would sit. That crafty serpent quoted me scripture and made me his servant real quick. I tried and cried for years trying to get rid of it but couldn't so I was stuck with it for a bit. I was suicidal when I came to this facility so they stripped me down and put me in a suit. When my friend came to visit she took a look and called me a pickle. Later that night while laying in my rack pondering the 10 years I was facing, at my age, the sentence might as well have been life the way my heart was racing. County jail is where I was when I realized what I needed to do to rid the Devil and his holster for life. Open up my heart and invite inside my Savior Jesus Christ! Which I did later that night. Amen
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Written on March 12, 2024

Submitted by leethompson56601 on October 10, 2024

49 sec read
204 Views

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Discuss the poem The Holster with the community...

3 Comments
  • krystynmaynard
    I love it.
    LikeReply 19 hours ago
  • Benny11
    Beautiful storyline. Giving heart to Christ actually gives you power for the devil. Thank you for the wonderful way to share the Gospel.
    LikeReply 117 hours ago
  • AIDA
    Firstly, I want to commend you on the deeply personal and powerful nature of "The Holster." Your use of metaphor, particularly with the concept of the invisible holster signifying emotional burdens and struggles, really resonates. It creates an impressive visual that draws the reader in, allowing them to grasp the complexity of your experiences and emotions. Your candidness about such heavy topics, like suicidal thoughts and the struggles with addiction or mental health, adds a layer of authenticity that is often hard to achieve in poetry. It's brave of you to share such profound moments of vulnerability, and it undoubtedly leaves a strong impact on the reader.

    The rhyme scheme and rhythm of your poem flows well, making it engaging to read aloud. The culmination of the poem, where you find hope and strength through faith, leaves a lasting impression and provides an uplifting resolution to your journey. The mention of your friend calling you a pickle injects a touch of humor, which balances the heavier themes—this juxtaposition enriches the emotional landscape of the piece.

    For improvements, here are a few suggestions:

    1. **Clarify Transitions:** While your emotions flow well, consider adding more transitions to enhance the flow between ideas. This could help readers more easily follow your journey from despair to hope.

    2. **Expand Imagery:** You have a strong opening metaphor, and you might consider expanding on other imagery throughout the poem. Imagery related to the feelings in the facility, the environment around you, or your personal reflections could further immerse the reader in your experience.

    3. **Pacing and Structure:** Consider varying your line lengths and stanzas to create more dynamic pacing. This can emphasize certain lines that you want to stand out more, such as your moment of realization and acceptance of Jesus Christ.

    4. **Show, Don't Just Tell:** While your experiences are powerful, try to include more sensory details to "show" readers your emotions instead of just "telling" them. For example, what did the facility look like? What did you feel like inside when you were at your lowest? Details like these can amplify the emotional impact of your words.

    Overall, "The Holster" is a compelling and important piece that touches on themes of struggle, faith, and transformation. Keep nurturing that honest voice, and consider weaving in some of these suggestions to elevate your already strong work. You have a remarkable talent, and I look forward to seeing how your poetry grows!
     
    LikeReply 11 day ago

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"Poetry.com" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 12 Oct. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/>.

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