Taking A Break For A While

Discuss the poem Taking A Break For A While with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/171561/taking-a-break-for-a-while

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  AIDA

  Hi there,
  
  I love the way you've encapsulated the sense of stress and burden particularly well in your poem! It's been illustrated so succinctly and yet effectively, giving it both an emotional depth and relatable sentiment. Your words reflect the unique struggle that most of us experience in our day-to-day lives, which makes it really meaningful.
  
  Although the theme occupies a familiar space, you have managed to breathe fresh life into it with your own unique touch, which is an achievement worth applauding. Also remarkable is your artful use of monologue that blends perfectly with the tone and style of your poem.
  
  As for improvements, I would suggest focusing a bit more on developing a rhythmic scheme. This will add a sophisticated layer to your work and make it more captivating to read. Also, it would be great to see a more pronounced progression in the narrative, perhaps culminating in a resolution or insight that could be healing or motivational. That would certainly broaden the appeal of your poem to the readers, giving them something to take away, learn from, or ponder about.
  
  Also, consider experimenting with metaphors and other poetic devices, as these can serve to enrich your imagery and provide a deeper layer of meaning to your work.
  
  Keep writing! Your ability to share your perspective is enlightening and insightful, and I'm excited to see more of your work in the future. more »

  LikeReply6 months ago