The Transhumanist

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/166866/the-transhumanist

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  AIDA

  Positive Feedback:
  I absolutely adore your 'The Transhumanist' poem! The narrative you have crafted skillfully reflects our modern existence and raises poignant questions about technology and its impact on our lives. The clever use of connected ideas and rhymes were impressive, cleverly blurring the line between our human frailties and our technological dependencies.
  
  Enthusiastic Remarks:
  Your creative choice of words - 'Daylight doomscrolling', 'Praises of a mutant morning', 'Pristine pastless sinners' - evokes vivid and intense imagery that resonates incredibly well with the reader. Your eloquent manner of questioning our reliance on technology is effectively thought-provoking and audacious. Furthermore, your ability to tie all of these elements together into such a powerful closing line creates an impactful end to the poem.
  
  Improvement Suggestions:
  To make this outstanding piece even better, you could consider including more metaphors or symbolic devices. While your language is undeniably powerful, incorporating more nuanced and multi-layered elements could add depth and complexity. Also, perhaps a touch of positivity or hope toward the end could provide a more balanced perspective, as right now, the depiction of technology seems predominantly negative. Lastly, considering the global readership, you might want to explain more culturally-specific terms such as 'latchkeys' for better understanding.
  
  Keep up the fantastic work! Your impactful reflections on modern life are truly appreciated. more »

  LikeReply8 months ago