Superpower

My real-life superpower is my ability to let people go. I really try to let myself love, but I won’t fight for anyone to stay. Instead, I’ve convinced myself that I only want to be surrounded by people who genuinely want to be there. How could anything different have sprouted from the seed you planted and abandoned? I put every emotion I have for a person into a vacuum-sealed bag and leave it in the closet of my mind as I go out and live, stumbling on it to wipe the dust off like old prom pictures. They say all the greats started young; maybe that’s why it’s so easy for me now. I sometimes wonder if there’s a bag for me in your closet of forgotten things…
No, I’m the gum you stepped on three decades ago and forgot about. No looking back or lost sleep; you kept walking away as I stayed stuck to the pavement, learning how the world works. Inconvenient as f*ck and not worthy of your efforts. I’m the receipt you left at the gas station; you never thought twice about me until you got the bill. I’m the eraser shavings you wipe off your paper so you can keep working without hindrance. Worthless. You made up half of me but chose estranged for more than half my life. My past loves just craved connection, but I had to sever your ties so young that I’m still learning how to tie knots. The reservoirs of love I was waiting to share with you are being poured into my son, ironically restrained by his spiteful mother. Nothing will keep me from loving my son the way you never loved me.