Nefertiti



Beneath the skies of goddess Nuit
There lies my passion's sole pursuit—
It's her, whose soul is beauty's claim,
A Nubian of Pharaoh's name:

Beauteous Nefertiti, hail!
Arise, my love, leave crook and flail,
And let us from this palace flee,
So we in silent love can be.

The moon has known our hidden plight,
And we her sacred silver light—
And all, in company as one,
Our secret keep from Aten's sun.

How joyful, though, this hidden pledge
That loving wades the Nile's edge:
That hand in hand reflects the bliss
Of lovers raptured in a kiss.

But now that crimson light and hue
Disperses all our midnight blue,
And soon that other god will rise
And cast his cope upon our skies.

So know, before alas we part,
That you, dear queen, are all my heart.
That even now I pine to see
Tomorrow's moon and you with me.
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Submitted by Vixility on July 08, 2023

Modified by Vixility on July 11, 2023

53 sec read
348

Quick analysis:

Scheme AABB CCDD AAEE FFGG HHII AADD
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 817
Words 171
Stanzas 6
Stanza Lengths 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4

John W. May

John W. May has lived in Colorado all his life. He currently works in the field of ophthalmology and loves to mountain bike and read about history. John first became a lover of poetry in 2008 after having read a poem by John Milton. He has been reading and studying the works of various poets since. His favorite poets are Emily Dickinson, Fyodor Tyutchev and W. B. Yeats. more…

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5 Comments
  • Kestinery7
    beautiful
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Vixility
      Thank you for stopping by, and for the compliment. Read a couple of poems on your page as well. Loved "Valor" and the archaic language you employed throughout.
      LikeReply10 months ago
  • lovingempath
    I love traveling through time and space when I read a poem of yours John. You have a way with visuals and rich language that captures any given moment or time period; and are able to develop the complex emotions of your characters; as if you are inside every one of them. That's deep! You never disappoint! . 
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Vixility
      Oh man, I'm speechless. I agree, there is definitely a time travelling aspect to poetry writing that I deeply enjoy (and if I'm being honest, a sort of escapism as well).
      This particular poem was inspired by a 3D image of Nefertiti's bust done by Sven Geruschkat. If you haven't seen it, you should check it out.
      Thank you again for your kind (and encouraging) words. I've said to before, I'll say it again: You make me blush. 
      LikeReply 110 months ago
    • lovingempath
      If I made you 'blush', then my job here is done :).
      LikeReply 110 months ago
  • Byrontime
    Brilliant poetry-this could be a poem by Keats-it is from another epoch.Hail!
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Vixility
      Wow, Keats! One of my favorites (so sad that he died so young). Yeah, that's a serious compliment. Thank you! I really enjoyed working on this piece.
      LikeReply10 months ago
    • Vixility
      I tried to look at some of your poetry as well but didn't see anything posted.
      LikeReply10 months ago
  • JoeStrickland
    I really like this a lot, John
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Vixility
      Hey, very much appreciated. I have a handful of 'historically themed' poems that I really take pride in, and this particular one is among them.
      LikeReply 110 months ago
  • NeilMcLeod
    THis is a very good poem it flows well , this content is on point and well researched. Bravo
    LikeReply 110 months ago
    • Vixility
      Thank you, NeilMcLeod ...
      Research indeed! I've always carried within me a deep affinity for the Eygptian culture (pre-Ptolemean, of course), and for this particular poem I had to brush up on some of my history pertaining to it. This was an enjoyable write and I thought a ballad measure was the perfect model given the subject matter. I appreciate you stopping by. 
      LikeReply10 months ago

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"Nefertiti" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 May 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/164110/nefertiti>.

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