Take Me Back But Not

Take me Back But Not
By: Jonathan Conway

 Back yonder when many days to pass
I wish to go back before my thoughts were rather crass
When many a’ tears shan’t not be shed
When my life hang not but upon a thread
Wishful thinking let me meet my end
Assimilations like acquisitions  
I know death is around the bend
Might I not be mortal incarnation
What have I to fend?
Take me back but not
I don’t wish to stay here for too long
But even my past was pain I prolong
The present I’m not trying
Though back when it was simply I was crying
All throughout time I am hurting
I say I’m fine, lying through my teeth it’s worsening
My trust is fading
Calibrating to the environment I am facing
Yet this weary world weighs heavy on my weathered shoulders
Like Atlas
I understand my self judgment can be rather callous
I can hold the weight of the world but yet not bear the burden of my sins
Looking in the past when Asmodeus looks rather grim
Rigged from the start, this is a game I could never win
I’m still coping, hoping that my troubled mind stops moping
Hindered will, these people I’m revoking
From my mind still stoking that flame
In which the joy bleeds like it’s choking
The troubled child rots
Take me back but not