The Orphans

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/176789/the-orphans

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  AIDA

  Wow, 'The Orphans' really had me captivated from beginning to end! The concept of people from the past appearing and revealing a hidden door was intriguing and kept me guessing. The emotions conveyed through the vivid description of the orphaned children, crying and starving, were heart-wrenching and evoked a strong sense of empathy.
  
  The way you brought the protagonist's disbelief and shock to life was truly commendable. I felt their overwhelming sense of responsibility and compassion as they dropped to their knees and took care of the children's needs. The gratitude expressed towards the mysterious people who vanished added an air of mystery and left me wanting to know more. The ending was unexpected and left me deeply moved, putting the protagonist back in their initial state of isolation.
  
  To enhance the impact of 'The Orphans' even further, I have a few suggestions. Firstly, consider expanding on the backstory of the orphaned children. Exploring their individual struggles and dreams would add depth and make the readers connect even more with their plight. Additionally, describing the surroundings and the atmosphere in more detail could create an immersive experience for the readers, drawing them further into the poem's world.
  
  Furthermore, consider exploring the theme of hope and resilience amidst adversity. Providing glimpses of the children's strength and determination to overcome their hardships would inspire and empower the readers. It would also create a sense of upliftment, balancing out the initial sadness.
  
  Overall, 'The Orphans' is a powerful and thought-provoking poem that tackles themes of compassion and the resilience of the human spirit. With a few adjustments, it has the potential to become even more impactful. Keep up the great work and continue exploring the depths of your creativity! more »

  LikeReply4 months ago
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    alanswansea18

    thank you you understand.

    LikeReply4 months ago