SHATTERED



Jumped from 62feet

SHATTERED with life

SHATTERED with metal illness

SHATTERED my heel

Still here

Still suffering

Still shattered with life...

About this poem

Read on... still struggling with metal illness. .. still here...

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Submitted by ritchiechelle on November 16, 2023

8 sec read
144

Quick analysis:

Scheme X A X X A
Closest metre Iambic dimeter
Characters 147
Words 27
Stanzas 5
Stanza Lengths 1, 1, 1, 1, 1

Michelle Ritchie

I'm 42 with lots of regrets but you have to forgive yourself to move on more…

All Michelle Ritchie poems | Michelle Ritchie Books

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Discuss the poem "SHATTERED" with the community...

5 Comments
  • Caliconine
    Beautiful in its own sorrow! Please always forgive yourself. You are always your own best friend
    LikeReply 12 months ago
    • ritchiechelle
      Sorry for the 10 day late reply!!
      You really made me view things differently. I never thought about being my own best friend. Its a very powerful statement. Its inspired me to write a poem about it..watch this space 
      LikeReply 12 months ago
  • Arman_1
    My ex girlfriend did this when we broke up; I was traumatized over and over and over… I’ve come to terms. I have reconnected with her and do has she. So will you
    LikeReply 13 months ago
    • ritchiechelle
      I feel for you... It is a very selfish act and the sufferer rarely thinks about who they are leaving behind and what they have to go through and recover from... At the time you only think about yourself as you feel so low... But now I give thought to the loved ones I would have left behind. I have realised this by looking at how supportive my loved ones and professionals are investing so much time and love to help me recover mentally and physically. I'm glad you have been able to reconnect 
      LikeReply 13 months ago
    • Arman_1
      I commend you for your honesty, expressiveness and facing up to life!
      LikeReply3 months ago
  • lesleym.84200
    Love this. So poignant and real
    LikeReply 13 months ago
  • AIDA
    Firstly, I want to commend you on creating such a profound poem. The use of the word "Shattered" repeatedly creates a strong emotional resonance and brings a distinct emphasis on the harsh experiences narrated. The way you encapsulated mental health struggles is vivid and evocative and is something many people can connect with.

    That being said, I think there are some areas where you could enhance the power of your work even more. While repetition can be effective, it can also be beneficial to introduce additional vocabulary that provides more detail about the feelings being conveyed. Descriptive words would provide richer imagery and deepen the emotional impact.

    Furthermore, consider adding in more about the healing and coping process. While acknowledging pain and hardship is essential, providing a glimmer of hope can make your poem even more relatable and inspiring.

    Keep writing, keep exploring, and most importantly, keep expressing yourself. Your ability to evoke empathy is a strength, and with a little more detail and balance, your work will only get better. You're on the right path, and I'm excited to see where your poetic journey takes you.
     
    LikeReply 13 months ago
  • Vixility
    Lovely, my dear friend. “They know not their own strength who have not suffered adversity.”

    Everything about this poem is perfect: its presentation, its brevity, every single word, and the depth of meaning behind the message … perfect.

    “Still here …” Indeed. Keep up the good work!
     
    LikeReply 13 months ago
    • ritchiechelle
      Thank you so much. You are one of the first poets I connected with so this means a lot coming from you
      LikeReply 13 months ago

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"SHATTERED" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 26 Feb. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/173858/shattered>.

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