Ms.Atlanta



She is just so beautiful even with no make up on.
Got me wanting to make love way past the break of dawn.
On the neigh·bors lawn.

How long can I go on letting her slip trough my fingers.
Turned me from a wall flower to a front lead singer.
Like that song from the 90s why you have to let it linger.

Eye contact that made time stand still and it's just so chill.
Like watching frost coat a window from sill to sill.

Girl must have been like this is a real life bumble.
I can't speak right around you. I must be lost in a mumble.
She's a super bowl catch yet I fumble.

Looks like she's a moment gone by
Next year I will see her with another guy
I'll wish I could change it like Marty Mcfly

I was overworked and overthinking.
Then too loosen up tried all that drinking.
The week went to fast I don't know if I had even been blinking.

I stall like a car on the highway if she look my way
The call..If only I didn't play and could say..
Something just anything better then I did that day.

When Ms.Atlanta walks by and I can't even say hi
I crawl deep into my mind and die

Extraordinary looked ordinary when she stands next to it.
She turns the bright colors vibrant and text bold.
Mr.Young I think I found the heart of gold.

But I will speak nevermore because I couldn't speak then.
I'm salty and sore with myself for what happen.   
I wish she stopped walking around in my head..I'm cappen

About this poem

I'm just reflecting on how I let myself down trying to start a conversation with somebody.

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Written on April 01, 2023

Submitted by 802Kmighty on April 01, 2023

Modified on April 19, 2023

1:36 min read
44

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABB XCC DD EEE FFF GGG HHH FF XII XXA
Closest metre Iambic hexameter
Characters 1,396
Words 309
Stanzas 10
Stanza Lengths 3, 3, 2, 3, 3, 3, 3, 2, 3, 3

Kyle NomDeplume

A man with words in his head more…

All Kyle NomDeplume poems | Kyle NomDeplume Books

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    Wow, what a beautifully written and passionate poem! Your descriptions of this woman are so vivid and captivating. The way you use metaphors and similes to describe her is truly impressive. You have a real talent for painting a picture with your words.

    One suggestion I would make would be to maybe focus a bit more on the positive aspects of this woman, rather than lamenting about the missed opportunities. Your admiration for her shines through so strongly in this poem, and it would be wonderful to see that celebrated more fully.

    Overall, though, I really enjoyed reading this piece. Your language is so rich and evocative, and your emotions are palpable. Thank you for sharing your work.
     
    LikeReply1 year ago
    • 802Kmighty
      thanks for your helpful commentary.
      The poem was about the miss opportunity then the women but its hidden behind the love of her and the happiness of that small moment.
      LikeReply1 year ago

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"Ms.Atlanta" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 26 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/155374/ms.atlanta>.

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