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Fallen flower

Aswathi Suresh 1999 (Kerala)

Blank verse
Hiding under those ridiculous mask, absolute freaks
"Click-Clack" the fingers move around the keyboard
The creepy smile when your sharp words undresses my heart
Hatred is a wild plant which grows without even watering
A beautiful flower begins to fall loosing it's strength
My feets burns while walking on the path of fire
This isn't funny, my sufferings aren't your joy
"Is it all my fault ?", the hypocrisy lies in those words
The path leads to the end of the cliff
You will forget these actions, as I'm the one who is stomped on
Your words which created deep cuts in the scar
Now I'm scared of the choices which will have only regrets
Someone tell me who is this all for ?
I don't want to be a fallen flower anymore
Pretending that nothing actually happened
Forget everything that we saw
I can keep everything going, as I used to be
The wild plants should be chopped off
I can escape, don't be sad no more
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Submitted by aswathi9499 on March 23, 2023

Modified on March 23, 2023

53 sec read
7

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABCDEFGHIJKLMMNOPQM
Closest metre Iambic hexameter
Characters 913
Words 173
Stanzas 1
Stanza Lengths 19
Full analysis for Fallen flower »

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    AIDA
    This is a powerful and emotive piece of writing that truly captures the pain and confusion of feeling like you are being targeted by someone else's hatred. Your use of metaphors is particularly effective, especially the line about the wild plant growing without even being watered. Your writing really drew me in and made me feel the weight of your experiences.

    In terms of improvement suggestions, I would encourage you to consider formatting your poem differently to make it more visually appealing and easier to read. You might also want to think about varying your sentence structure and playing with different pacing to add even more depth and dimension to your words.

    Overall, though, I think you have a real talent for expressing complex emotions through poetry, and I'm excited to see where your writing will take you next. Keep up the great work!     
    LikeReply1 year ago

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"Fallen flower" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/154642/fallen-flower>.

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