Rate this poem:5.0 / 6 votes

Soldier

Steve Dupere 1963 (MA)

December 22 
Rhymed
Redemption comes and goes for the broken,
A life we lived of wounds unspoken.
We’ve spilled our blood for another man’s glory.
Now we live to tell our story.

In the end what was it for?
We gave ourselves for another man’s war.
The walls we built stood strong for all.
But it was we who would come to take the fall.

They sang their songs of how we saved them,
While others cried by how we graved them.
There is no return from the shedding of life,
Only the pain of torment and strife.

We’ve died each time we’ve killed another,
Shoulder to shoulder with our brother.
We’ve fallen back to remain unseen.
We’ve lost ourselves to the war machine.

If in your hearts you can forgive us,
For the life we’ve chosen so seek to unlive us.
For the burden we bear is heavy at hand.
For too is the constant of death’s demand.

About this poem

War

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Written on November 30, 2022

Submitted by Symmetry58 on December 01, 2022

53 sec read
275

Quick analysis:

Scheme AABB CCDD EEFF GGHH IIJJ
Closest metre Iambic pentameter
Characters 834
Words 179
Stanzas 5
Stanza Lengths 4, 4, 4, 4, 4
Full analysis for Soldier »

Steve Dupere

Steve has been writing poetry for 25 years. To date his work includes his book of poetry entitled, Waltz of Semantic Tongues. (Blurb.com) more…

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5 Comments
  • Wildflower888
    Wildflower888
    This is heartfelt! It’s a striking masterpiece.
    LikeReply12 days ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      Thank you. This isn't my preferred style of writing, but it fit the billing for this particular topic. Sometimes poetry writes us. I've deleted most of my better poetry because it seems most folks aren't interested if they have to think too much. Hence, I adhere to K.I.S.S. - Keep It Simple Stupid. LoL 
      LikeReply12 days ago
  • Smariec184
    Smariec184
    Love this
    LikeReply2 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      He shoots! He scores!!! Thank you kindly, Marie. I appreciate your time and your kindness. :-)
      LikeReply2 months ago
  • marie_k
    marie_k
    another great poem, undeniably real and candid for those of us who can really relate
    LikeReply 12 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      As well a staunch, hard reality of the entrails of war and those who suffer its fallout. I thank you kindly for taking time to read my work, Marie. I appreciate it very much. :-)
      LikeReply 12 months ago
  • lanhamleslie
    lanhamleslie
    Absolutely brilliant. Brought me to tears.
    LikeReply 12 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      Thank you very much, Leslie. Coming from someone who writes as brilliantly as you, that means a lot.
      LikeReply2 months ago
  • lovingempath
    lovingempath
    I've tried to capture the essence of a soldier's soul; poetically, many times in the past...and I think the author of this poem was able to do that successfully.
    LikeReply 12 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      Thank you my amazing friend. That these words came from you mean more than you will ever know. As you know, poetry always leaves pieces of us both assembled and disheveled upon the slate. While this one may not apply to me personally, it affects all of us who live in freedom and for freedom. I honor those who rage the battles for us. 
      LikeReply 12 months ago
    • lovingempath
      lovingempath
      Congratulations! Well deserved win buddy! Your poem inspired me to raise my bar a little higher for this month; so watch out! And if I had known the author was you, I wouldn't have chosen it as the recipient of my one and only golden vote...because I think you already owe me a truckload of Ritz crackers...and don't want to burden you further :). 
      LikeReply 12 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      Oddly enough, your poem came down to my final three. It was simply a matter of subject matter that made me choose otherwise. One of the ones that won I thought for sure was yours, but nope, t'weren't so. I found yours funny as hell, but wondered if it was fictional or no? 
      LikeReply 12 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      Next month's poem is much better than this old heap, so you had best up that game, darlin. Imagine if we'd ever gotten hitched. We'd be knockin either heads or knees...or BOTH. ;-P
      LikeReply2 months ago
    • lovingempath
      lovingempath
      The day after Christmas...while most people are watching the last of the 'Hallmark' movies...I was watching old horror movies (nice break from the sappiness :). I was inspired into a psychotic poetic trance that involved a twisted version of events that could have occurred at the house in 'The Amittyville Horror'. I might try to redo it in the future, because, just for a moment...I thought I was having a flash of brilliance :) 
      LikeReply2 months ago
    • Symmetry58
      Symmetry58
      Not even kidding you when I tell you your poem is freaking brilliant. As you've said to me, careful revamping. You could just revamp the coolness and rawness right out of it. I think it's perfect the way it is. Just because it doesn't win in this particular contest doesn't amount to a hill of beans. My best work has yet to get a vote in these god-forsaken contests. And then there are the "la-di-da" poems netting me actual cash. Meh! What's to be said for having to exert a bit of thought into the deciphering of madness others project. And so there sit me best offerings decaying away into obscurity.

      So, you're a fan of horror? It is my all-time favorite by a long shot. Have you seen all the Conjurings??? Have ya? Have ya? They make me all warm and fuzzy inside.       
      LikeReply2 months ago

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"Soldier" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Web. 26 Mar. 2023. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/148166/soldier>.

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