I Believe I Am All Wrong for This Place

Lisbeth Lavigne 1970 (Massachusetts)



I Believe I Am All Wrong for This Place

I believe I am all wrong for this place
I have applied my war paint,
Perfected the wear of my dress.
I settle here emotionally naked at the bar,
Sans reading and writing accoutrements.

The man near me notices no presence of my being.
Hunkered in his blue electric world,
As they have all become.
I remain a dim smudge in a nearby realm.
No virility to covet my voluptuous breasts, seductive hips.

Solitary amongst the others,
My loneliness is sufferable.
Am I always meant to be as such?
No shining knight saving me from dreadful existence.
No declarations of love.

Where have I been mistaken?
Struggling for identity,
Have I become too independent?
I have lingered in this body far too long,
Always raped and abandoned.

The man has another woman approaching.
She is not so beautiful as I imagined.
Well endowed, soft laughter.
Exuberant smile, exuding confidence.
Characteristics making a woman worthy of love.

I carry intimidation, they say.
I carry unapproachability, they say.
I carry an unpolished beauty,
And I am disposable to they
Who see me solely as sexual desire.

How dare I fall in love.
Falling for the lies.
My heart broken repetitively,
Encased now in impenetrable stone.
Alas, understanding.

My body, they want only superficially.
They want only my sex.
They want only to rule.
Use my soul, crush my heart.
Itself protecting feigned emotion.

As the man of my dreams once asked,
“What is your dysfunction?”
Causing me pause and disappointment.
He too shall choose another,
Taking my heart and soul to its well-deserved grave.
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Submitted by LLavigne on April 17, 2021

Modified on April 24, 2023

1:21 min read
1,041

Quick analysis:

Scheme A Axxxx bxxxx xcxde fghxi bijde kkgkj excxb cxcxf xfhjx
Closest metre Iambic pentameter
Characters 1,540
Words 272
Stanzas 10
Stanza Lengths 1, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5

Lisbeth Lavigne

Lisbeth Lavigne is a pseudonym for a cardiothoracic surgeon born and raised in Michigan and writing for the past 25 years. more…

All Lisbeth Lavigne poems | Lisbeth Lavigne Books

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13 Comments
  • steinberg.davida
    Love the 2nd "verse" contrasting a person eschewing devices feeling like a smudge verses the person (people, the speaker feels surrounded) in a blue electric world. Raises the question of what is real? and then the speaker sees the reality of the woman arriving verses what she imagined in her head. Are feelings and imagination real? If not, why NOT be in a (just as real and non-real) blue electric world? Hmmm Thank you for posting! 
    LikeReply1 year ago
  • Marchant299
    I feel the emotion in your heart and the pain of rejection. Such an excellent way to purge the negativity inside you. I hope you find a man who will love you and heal your pain.
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • Symmetry58
    Very smartly written and profusely evocative. Five-star for this Massachusetts man.
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • Dougla$Irishman
    The world is on her doorstep, reality has never been here !
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • tmgraphicstexas
    Love this!
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • Josianna
    This is powerful, well written and evocative. I could clearly imagine this woman and feel the heat of her emotions.
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • Josianna
    A powerful and well written piece, very evocative.
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • Soulwriter
    Raw and honest. I like your style.
    LikeReply2 years ago
  • Sharam
    That was superb. I actually know someone who fits ur poem
    LikeReply 12 years ago
  • ronniefox
    A well written albeit sad poem. It stirs compassion in those who read it.
    LikeReply 22 years ago
  • MelitaCatWarren.09350
    Just a question to the community. What is each of your favorite topic to write about? Wondered. thanks!
    LikeReply 23 years ago
  • MelitaCatWarren.09350
    Self awareness can be a fabulous blessing if one can take raw honesty.
    This is a very heavy poem with lots of food for thought. Good work!
    LikeReply 13 years ago
  • MelitaCatWarren.09350
    This is a deeply sensitive, heavy, self-revealing piece. Maybe your opinio of yourself and love in general will take on another mood someday.
    I deeply thought-provoking piece. Excellent style!
    LikeReply3 years ago

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"I Believe I Am All Wrong for This Place" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 13 Jun 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/97807/i-believe-i-am-all-wrong-for-this-place>.

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