My Angel (A Poetic Narrative) (Written from a young girl's view point)



I remember that one fateful day:
The rain was pouring down; Streets were wet with tears; I looked into your face;

Just a short time before,
I had been in my car with my friends; We had just graduated; Sunshine and life were everywhere;

We were laughing,
And having a good time; Then, all at once, Everything disappeared;

I was there,
Lying on the ground; Looking into your face; Your hand touching me;

It was dark, though midday;
There were people running all around; Someone was screaming; I heard it, it was my friend;

I strained to move,
To go to her side, to comfort her; But the weight of my body, Made me feel like I was pinned down;

I touched my head;
My hand came back red; Blood was everywhere; I felt sick to my stomach;

And then, there you were;
I could barely see you; My eyesight was blurred; You touched me;

You said, everything would be alright;
Then I felt something; Something heavy on me; It made me feel warm;

In the midst of my cold;
In the midst of my dizziness; In the midst of the street; It made me feel warm; I laid there for a long time;

For what seemed like forever,
You stayed with me; You talked to me;

You made me feel better;
In the midst of everything; You made me feel better; I couldn't see your face;

Just an outline of you;
As they put me in the ambulance; I wanted to thank you; But you were gone;

Then I was inside;
 The doctors and nurses; Everyone there helping; Making me feel better;

I asked about you;
Nobody knew; I searched my memory; My blood-soaked, tear stained memory;

You were gone.

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Submitted on May 19, 2017

Modified on April 26, 2023

1:27 min read
27

Quick analysis:

Scheme AB XC XX CD AX XX XX ED XX XX ED EB FG XE FD G
Closest metre Iambic hexameter
Characters 1,502
Words 291
Stanzas 16
Stanza Lengths 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 1

Donald Loudon

I started to write because of the great feeling of release, and being able to do something of my own that I enjoyed. Since then, writing has become a way of life for me, and I enjoy it thoroughly. I write about things I feel strongly and or know a lot about. more…

All Donald Loudon poems | Donald Loudon Books

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