WHY NOT

why not cry / why not scream / why never speak his name aloud again / the curse of a man / born into existence / I could have stayed away / I didn't / by the time I'd figured it out he was already gone / and so was I / by the time anyone realizes that court is usually followed by a victim or a survivor or some kind of story / then and only then / do they listen / I am riddled with disgust and remorse / chained down by expectations for a man / I knew for a long time / yet never knew at all / I hate sympathy / empathy is a more curious subject / the subject being me / the case file / shut and closed, shut and closed / reopened again and again / where did the truth lie / if I was literally right there / fighting for my rights the whole way down / waiting for a correction to a spelling error / speaking of injustice by nicknames and nicknames only / I don't care what were to happen next / I was scorned many times / never that hard / never have I hated a man more / in essence and in fury of / someone once known / yet still willing to be / forgotten.