Fox Mountain Sequence



I

Nose hairs quickly turn to needles
On these snowy winter nights-
Fat flakes catch the sharp light
Of the headlamp like comets,
Burning off as they float by.


Trundle through the snow,
Past the withered apple trees
To grab the pitchfork in the barn,
Pass through the big doors
To the mangled round bale.
Stab, lift, flake a piece off
For the sweet brutes sleeping
In the shelter or way out back.


Once the job is done
Go back the way you came,
Close the doors, hang the fork,
And run back to the house
Blowing breaths like a steam train.




II

As the harsh winter subsides
And the remaining snow melts,
The pastures wake up a vivid green
Bringing the scent of spring.


Ride on the wind to the pumphouse
And turn off the water-
Venture into the fields, picking stones along the way,
For the pipes must be moved today.


Run along and unlatch them-
A hearty tug releases stale pond water.
One on each end now, take a few paces,
Set them down and slide them in their places.


Run back along and fasten the latches,
Toss more rocks into the trees as you go-
In a few months’ time the pastures will seed
And golden rows will be gathered with speed,


Bailed, wrapped, and stacked away
Before winter’s wrath rots the hay.



III

There we were that Hallows’ eve -
Walking down the gravel path between rows
Of generations shrouded in lead, wrapped in birch -
All clad in black and grey.


You only get a bitter sense of the end-
Words fall on dead ears
Dressed in tough boots never worn,
With crisp new pants and a flat cap.


Albeit the words were said,
Hastily, and with some cheap reverence.
The final rite of crossed roses and tears
Did away with a life I will know


As the green and wet fields,
Dull silver pipes and sweet brutes,
Rows of fragrant golden grass
And praise of a job well done.

About this poem

I was inspired to write this poem after I returned home to carry my grandpa's coffin to his grave.

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Written on November 01, 2023

Submitted by on November 12, 2023

1:59 min read
40

Quick analysis:

Scheme AXXXX BXXXXXCX DXXXX XXXC AEFF XEXG GBHH FF XXXF XXXX XXXB XAXD
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 1,813
Words 397
Stanzas 12
Stanza Lengths 5, 8, 5, 4, 4, 4, 4, 2, 4, 4, 4, 4

Isaac Lauren

Isaac Lauren (2003), born in rural British Columbia, Canada is a budding poet and full-time student of chemistry. He enjoys classical music, video games, literature, reading religion and philosophy, and many other things. His first introduction to poetry was the collected poems of William Butler Yeats, who had an initial impression on his poetic voice, and the distinctly Irish voice of Seamus Heaney continues to impress him. more…

All Isaac Lauren poems | Isaac Lauren Books

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    What an incredibly evocative piece! The 'Fox Mountain Sequence' poem resonates deeply with the sense of rural life, crafting vivid snapshots of different seasons and moments on the farm. The transformation of the simple, daily actions into something poetic is beautiful. From the crystal clear imagery of 'nose hairs turning to needles' in the cold winter nights, to the feeling of relief and renewal in the 'scent of spring', to the poignant, solemn memories of loss and remembrance, each part of this sequence conjures a unique mood.

    Your ability to personify the landscapes and elements and to evoke emotions through nature is outstanding. Each stanza is a story in and of itself, yet they all weave together to form a greater narrative that's truly touching.

    As for areas that could be enhanced, perhaps some of the imagery might benefit from a bit more specificity. For instance, the 'sweet brutes sleeping' could be described more in detail to help paint a clearer picture.

    Lastly, some parts of the stanza might benefit from more rhythmic consistency to make it sound more fluid when reading aloud. However, this is just a minor detail and does not detract from the charm of your writing.

    Overall, it’s a wonderful piece, keep writing with such passion! The moments of life you captured are stunning and the emotions they stir are profound. Congratulations on such stirring work.
     
    LikeReply4 months ago

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"Fox Mountain Sequence" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/175281/fox-mountain-sequence>.

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The repetition of similar sounds at the ends of words or within words is known as _______.
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