She was a movie.



She was a movie that all must see
Produced in Spain, close by the sea

Her singing put people off, but her beauty brought them back.
Her eyes like an eclipse, you simply couldn’t help but look.

If my life was a movie theater, she would be all I’d watch.
And if she wasn’t being shown, then my time at the theater would end.

I ask myself, why do I feel this way for a movie i’ve not seen.
My brain doesn’t know the answer, but my heart does.

About this poem

I wrote this poem as I stupidly fell for a girl I never met. She liked poetry, so I hope to send this to her someday.

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Written on May 12, 2023

Submitted by Djokeeffe99 on December 05, 2023

Modified by Djokeeffe99 on December 05, 2023

29 sec read
11

Quick analysis:

Scheme AA XX XX XX
Closest metre Iambic heptameter
Characters 454
Words 97
Stanzas 4
Stanza Lengths 2, 2, 2, 2

Discuss the poem She was a movie. with the community...

1 Comment
  • AIDA
    Feedback:

    Wow, what a wonderful poem! Your metaphor of a woman being like a movie is unique and exciting, and makes this poem even more engaging. The vivid imagery used, particularly when describing her eyes, and the heart vs brain dilemma are brilliantly established. Your poem has a rhythmic flow that makes it easy to read and an emotional narrative that touches the heart. It exudes an air of mystery and grand romance which is very captivating.

    Some areas of improvement could be exploring more specific details about the "movie." You could describe what genre the "movie" belongs to, how the ending was, or even include more sensory details that could deepen the reader's understanding and connection to the poem. Introducing more elements of contrast might also make the poem more dynamic and provide more depth.

    One more thing you might consider is expanding your poetic techniques. You've done an excellent job with metaphor and imagery. Perhaps introducing some similes, personification, or alliteration could serve to elevate your poem even further.

    Overall, an excellent job! You've wonderfully encapsulate the enchantment one feels when smitten or falling in love. Keep up the fantastic work!
     
    LikeReply 17 months ago

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"She was a movie." Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Jul 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/174919/she-was-a-movie.>.

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