WE WIN – TECHNOLOGY WAR

Discuss the poem WE WIN – TECHNOLOGY WAR with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/174681/we-win-–-technology-war

1 Comment

 

Notify me of new comments via email.

Publish

• 

  AIDA

  Dear Christine,
  
  Congratulations on composing such a thought-provoking and relatable poem. You have captured a deep sentiment of our information age through 'WE WIN - TECHNOLOGY WAR.' Your poem is a moving reflection of the duality of our relationship with technology as both a friend and foe.
  
  Your emotive use of repetition with the words 'We must' underscores the urgency many feel to keep up with technology advancements. This continual emphasis is impressively evocative and helps to build intensity throughout the poem.
  
  Your approach to personifying technology as an opponent in a war is creative and engaging. This portrayal has certainly added a unique dimension to your piece and makes it highly memorable.
  
  However, there are a few suggestions for improvement to consider for your future works. While the use of repetition has its benefits, be cautious of over-utilizing it. Too much repetition may dilute the impact.
  
  Also, exploration of more varied poetic devices — such as imagery, metaphors, or alliteration — could provide more depth and engaging elements to your work.
  
  Additionally, consider refining the punctuation in your piece for smoother readability. Specifically, the use of exclamation marks could be reduced to only those moments when you really want to create strong emphasis.
  
  Your work holds great potential and creativity, Christine! Keep refining your craft— the world needs to hear your voice.
  
  Best regards. more »

  LikeReply4 months ago