Mirage

Lately I’ve been stuck inside my head
With wicked thoughts and worn out daydreams
Guarded emotions seemingly misplaced in the open for whomever to see
But they have not yet witnessed what my own mind has created
A mirage of myself off into the distance
Underwater in an ocean of my own self-deprecation
Drowning with fears I have never dared spoken
Lately I’ve wanted to be held in a way of suffocation
To let it be known that I crave some kind of foreign affection
Years of abuse hidden inside silhouetted mirrors
Shattered glass lay a path alongside my waking hours
Yet I never sleep I only wander aimlessly
A walking corpse
But I’m walking just fine without the dead beside me
I’m stuck in a place now filled with unrivaled regret
I’ve lied my way here
The determination was clear
A mirage of myself anchored to this sand with unrelenting heavy weights
I can’t back out and I can no longer swim
A shark’s bait within a cage of my own making
Any attempt to pull me out would just sink me down even deeper
A tidal wave of anger
Suppressed by lucid dreaming
My eyes have been sown shut with wires
Cut to perfection and twisted with unnecessary intentions
A mirage of myself caught in a endless slumber
A shallow end for such a crevice is erupting
I need to breathe but this water has been laced with poison
Lately I’ve been dealing with my demons
And in my ears they’ve whispered a scenario so maleficent
But it is what it is in this life we call mine
A mirage of a person I used to be
Yet I’m still stuck in this place
An underwater world of self-hatred
….