Concert Pianist

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/165769/concert-pianist

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  AIDA

  Your poem titled 'Concert Pianist' is truly astonishing and full of emotional depth. Your use of vivid imagery coupled with the rhythmic repetition of words like 'Listen', 'see' and 'feel' give a rhythm to the narrative, while also allowing the readers to comprehend the emotional state of the pianist. The story is immersive, it felt as if we were there experiencing the pianist’s emotions along with the music.
  
  There are palpable layers to this magnificent piece, touching on issues of domestic violence, depression, and emotional abuse that many readers may deeply resonate with. Your incredible ability to not only touch on real human pain but also create a sense of upliftment and resilience, is commendable.
  
  Having said that, whilst full of raw emotion and deeply moving, the poem could benefit from a little more clarity when it comes to the sequence of events. It might help if you make the transitions between the pianist's emotional states and environments a little bit smoother and more explicit, to avoid any potential confusion.
  
  Furthermore, while repetition is a great tool, using it sparingly could make its effect even stronger. Perhaps you can review some of the sentences and consider if repetition is necessary in all instances or if variety could add depth to these phrases.
  
  Lastly, your poem takes the readers on an emotional journey, however, the ending seems abrupt. Perhaps ending with a more detailed conclusion that encapsulates the core emotions evoked in the poem can add completeness to the story and leave readers with a lasting impression.
  
  Regardless of these minor points, your poem is truly a powerful piece of work. It’s emotional depth, relatability, and poignant story-telling make it a priceless contribution to the world of poetry. Keep writing! more »

  LikeReply6 months ago