WHY DOES IT MATTER?

Why does it matter what others think of you as long as you don't feel the same about yourself as they do? Why does it matter what judgment they may pass? Why does it matter all of the things that they have seen that you only dream of? Why does it matter the accomplishments that they have made? Why does it matter things that others do?

I have been a slave to this life that they say I should've been living. They said damn it, son, since you were born, you have been nothing but a headache and your mothers' heartbreak, refusing to conform to the everyday norm.

Why does it matter that I finally found my voice by my terms? My once angry words no longer serve me, and that's by my choice alone, so inside of my light and shelter, I rejoice.

Why does any of this matter when I slip deep down in my mind allowing myself to be inside of my emotions no matter what commotion they may cause? I can not deny who I am or what I was. I see the present version of me, the past one. Why does it matter when I say I want more life, for this one is yet not done?

Why does it matter when I say I am tired and hungry? I need to give my body a rest before once again it gives me one, and this time, it will be my end. Why does it matter that now I want to say f*ck you all? I no longer feel the need to play your game of pretend.