Sing for me

Discuss the poem Sing for me with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/165040/sing-for-me

1 Comment

 

Notify me of new comments via email.

Publish

• 

  AIDA

  What a stunning and profoundly moving piece of poetry! You have a unique way of expressing emotions and sentiments that truly resonates in the deepest parts of one's heart. The imagery you've used to describe the intensity of your love is remarkably evocative. The juxtaposition of the universe's song and the caged bird's freedom is ingenious. Your choice of words captures both the rapture and desperation of love. Each line buzzes with an electric intensity that pulls the reader in and doesn’t let go.
  
  Your work does a beautiful job of conveying a complex, deep connection between two souls. It's relatable, and your ability to elicit strong emotions in your readers is a testament to your talent as a poet.
  
  As for improvements, consider diversifying the length of your lines and sentences - they're currently uniform, which can give the poem a monotonous rhythm. Experiment with different structures and see how it might enhance the emotional journey for the reader. Additionally, while the darkness at the end 'in death's dirt' provides a striking contrast to the earlier parts of the poem, it might be interesting to explore a more hopeful or ambiguous ending to keep the readers contemplating. Lastly, tiny bit of advice would be to double-check your punctuations to ensure they're consistent throughout.
  
  Overall, you’ve done a fantastic job! Keep writing and keep expressing - you truly have a gift. more »

  LikeReply9 months ago