Faded

Is it possible to be surrounded by people and still feel alone? or does the curse of loneliness burn deep within my soul?
in the past I was chained as my future slipped away,
and that the price I must pay for the cost of other shame unwillingly as I watch my happiness fades away.

Robbed off my youth I wore it with smile,  
the harder the pain the brighter it would shine

Dark were the caves that held my youthful heart at bay,
cold where the chains that held me steadily in place.

I drank from the river of my own sweat and tears
still I was scorned for the way it left me shattered and deranged.

Do you remember how it felt when you stripped me of myself?
and left in it's wake this hollowed empty
shell?
you found it quite appealing as you drank it with delight
and though I didn't plea beg somehow I still lost the fight.

I gave up on myself it was the best thing to do
and even though I lost myself I was considered mere dust on your shoe.

They say it's your fault but I only blame myself for I was the one who showed fear and I knew that you could tell.

Never should you cry
it is a fence I must uphold
for the standard of the last it surely differs from the old.

Always wear a smile they should never see you cry
though the essence of your youth waves a very sad goodbye.

The words that are spoken are burden of there own
although they never seem to notice it even when it's clearly shown.

I see my own rainbow
but in different shades of gray the colors in my life had somehow faded all away.

Outside in the cold shadows of your mind
a little child is lost never again to be found.