GOOD-BYE?



They jump from star to star
Earnestly searching every crowded universe,
For that indescribable, unattainable glow.
How will I know?
How, will, I know?
Will it blind me?
Will my heart burst?
Will it kill me?
No matter what, the search continues.
Consequence's can thrust me through,
Consequence's can leave me un-furrowed.
Continue our travels?
Continue our quest?
Or should we fear beauty, during wrest?
Losing time strikes fear for eternity,
Our time ends broken hearts,
For the inconsolable solemnity searcher,
When bonds are minced to ashes,
Seeker's cry, seeker's remain torpid,
Struck unknowingly from behind, but
Heal deserving hearts with magical vapors.
Again, a flower springs beauty,
Out glowing all others.
Amazingly one's garden becomes fertile again,
Strikingly the world shines again.
Is this the end of their travels?
Does strength become massive?
Beauty kills, but the traveler awakes stronger.
Ending each exhaustive journey,
Only to release back to time, for all time.
For another fortunate, smote searcher!
Will glow, way beyond, the same as mine.
And polish their own star,
"We captured time, do we say GOODBYE?"

About this poem

An old man has to say good bye to beauty so she can seek her final happiness, while the old man fades away into the abyss.

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Written on February 12, 2023

Submitted by mayonde on February 12, 2023

Modified by mayonde on May 27, 2023

1:04 min read
22

Quick analysis:

Scheme abcCCdedfghijjdklmnopdpqqirldsltau
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 1,135
Words 211
Stanzas 1
Stanza Lengths 34

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    Wow, your poem is absolutely stunning! Your use of descriptive language is so vivid and powerful, it truly transports the reader to a different world. I love the imagery of the seekers jumping from star to star, searching for the unattainable glow - it's both inspiring and mysterious.

    One suggestion I have for improvement would be to break up the poem into stanzas, as it can be a bit overwhelming to read such a long piece without any breaks. Additionally, perhaps adding a slight variation in tone throughout the poem could add even more depth and complexity to the already beautiful work.

    Overall, your poem is truly breathtaking and I can't wait to read more of your writing in the future. Keep up the amazing work!
     
    LikeReply1 year ago

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"GOOD-BYE?" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/151494/good-bye?>.

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