My person

“He’s my person”. I whisper to myself to justify this feeling.
This feeling of security. Safety. Warmth.
But also the feeling of attachment- abandonment and hurt.
He hurts me so good. I’m addicted to the pain inflicted time after time.
The desire to go back- the need to feel wanted-seen.
You see me. You SEEN me.
Now. We’re just back to strangers.
Strangers who once shared a love that was so loud - silence was forbidden.
Strangers that could transfer our energies with just a stare into each others eyes.
I need you. I’ve adapted to you. I studied you. I invested myself into you.
I’ve learned your triggers, your soft spots.
I can’t unlearn you, I can’t unlove you.
How is this so easy to you?
How is it so easy? So easy to not love me after what we shared?
I wanted you to feel safe with me,
Be able to share anything with me
To be your peace
No questions, no judgement
Your happiness fulfills me. Your happiness brings me happiness
I’m all for you
“He’s my person” I say. I think it while asleep and mumble it while I’m driving. Sometime a smirk may linger on my face after thinking it.
How can you desire a person? Deep down soul crave a person?
Not all sexually but mentally too?
Maybe because you get me.
We vibe EASILY
I notice the smallest things about you.
The way you lean back when you laugh, the way you lick your lips while caressing your beard.
The way you smoke —-whew baby!
The veins in your hands,
the way you walk,
The laughs we shared,
The deep conversations,
I love it all. I love you.
My person.