I Am Not Yours

Lukewarm-clear liquid
In the cup you
stole from the dining hall,
Cold spring rolls on my countertop display
Declarations of your adoration
Ping from the cell phone in my fancy backpack.

And I try to close my eyes,
So I don’t have to watch
My hobbies dwindling,
Deep in to the danger-sphere
Of losing my heart
In the hands of a man,
In the mirage of marriage,
Before the resentment flourishes,
Like it was planted.

Jealousy not a frequent visitor here yet,
Just honey and moons and puppies,
Love, haze,
Floating through my brain:
It’s stronger than nicotine vapor,
Or you, or weed,
Or the smell of still-sticks-to-my-shoes blacktop,
Stronger than your kiss,
Or even, me.