Life

Life is nothing but a beautiful lie, A deception we live in, a place where we die, a manifestation that we create, But i  hope it’s not mine I’m in the wrong mental state ,  my perception is off  I’m in a whole lot of pain, the more that I push, the less that I gain, I need to do something but what can I do, in this revolution I can not start anew, I search for a way to think on my own, but the lack of conditioning might not bring me home, I feel if I start a new path to take, I will go crazy knowing all this was fake,  that thought is so frightening I’ll just stay right here, waiting for death so I may disappear,
That thing that is blocking my will to succeed, what is its origin and what does it need, I feel that it’s sucking the life out of me, the more that I wait the faster it feeds, It captures souls I’m beginning to see, am I paranoid or is there a hex on me, my soul feels so empty I have no energy, I need to lay down now and live with out a remedy, I fear it’s to late, my mental state, is beginning to fade with every decision I make,  with every breath that I take with every single mistake, help me please help me, I don’t want to end up in a fiery lake, a waste of a day is a waste of humanity
 so please don’t
Just sit there  in a misery, but it may be too late so please just sit still, just wait for eternity, that is what kills.