What a fag

Oh yes
What a fag
I remember it clear as day

You know,
Something changed in that moment
A new target on my back
A new line drawn
Don’t cross it
You can’t handle that again

Sitting stunned
Stone
My mind spinning
My world cracking

I’d been here before but not like this
The siege had begun
And I’d been looking the other way
Arrow in my back
Sudden pain

I replayed it for days
The haunting timbre echoed
About my skull and shook
Loose
My sanity
Like fine china, broken

I never told a soul
It steeped and got stronger
Who do you trust enough?
To honestly see you as a person
How do you tell them?
Where the arrow came from

And I wish I could say
It wouldn’t hurt now
I’ve heard it plenty
Used it too
But hateful spirit
Will sharpen a dull knife
The meaning can be removed
Until it cannot
And you’re gone