Analysis of 2:15 am

it's impossible for me to understand
but as i sit here
aimlessly hugging a pillow
i hope it reaches you.

i wish you knew how much i love you.

i wish you knew how much it hurts to see some of my own pain in someone else.

to not be able to say the right words to help

to not be able to save you.

i don't care what i'd have to do to stop your pain
if only, if only
there was a word
or a spell

i could take it and make it mine.

i would bleed for you.

i would scream and cry and pull my hair out

if it meant you wouldn't suffer anymore.

i deserve it far more than you do.

i don't love myself.
or i don't think i do.
but when i'm with you it feels like i don't have to.

i want you to see that i love you enough
that he loves you enough
that we love you enough
that you don't have to love yourself.