In My Heart

He's broken into my heart
climbed all the walls of my self protection
so precariously constructed,
past my guard against the possibility of being wounded or betrayed
my soul laid bare before him to crush or embrace,
if I told him,
how will he react?
I value our friendship more than he may even know,
so I keep quiet

With one glance from his charming blue eyes,
my world turned into a spinning spiral
but I am absolutely powerless to stop it all
this madness of a fairy tale story
unfolding right before my eyes

I'm falling hard and fast,
It feels as if I've jumped into an endless freefall
When will I land?
Where will I fall?
It's so unclear to me at this moment
What all this might transpire into with time

Does he think about me
as much as I think about him?
What if my hopes for him are shallow>
Am I being biased and blinded>
These are the questions that race through my mind
everyday
so no confession escapes my lips still

my once seemingly innocent friendship with him
has quickly transpired into a fascinating,
though frustrating,
one-sided love affair

his mysterious and shy demure has rendered me captive
alluring me to a place of no return
why is this so difficult?
if only my walls had been higher,
thicker
but then i ask myself,
"Maybe, I really want him there?"
though my answer may scare me slightly,
I can't hide from myself,
I know that I am now
Madly and hopelessly in love
with this sweet boy

I want to tell him so badly
but arrows of self-doubt invade my thoughts
he couldn't like me,
not possibly
so I stay quiet still

but the one thing that matters the most is this
I hope he will still be there,
Waiting
one day
to catch me while I fall