Depression

Depression grips me like freezing fog pulling me down like a tsunami.
Trying to break free from it's grips , I see hope but then again hope is torn away and back down I fall.
Spiralling are my emotions as my mind reminds me of all my faults, all my fears, all my losses, all my failures.
Once I was desired, it seems so long ago now.
Once I was held with love, now just a cold, loveless look of being annoyed of my very presence.
My emotions run wild like a stormy sea,
My heart crashing down like the waves upon rocks.
My tears they pour like a river running into the sea, endlessly night after night not sure of when they'll cease.
On the outside I smile, on the inside I cry
On the outside I seem like I'm making it through,
On the inside I feel like every day is a miracle that I make it even though I'm feeling so blue.
Unsure of what tomorrow holds I hope for a better day.
I hope for love, acceptance and to be desired.
The later I know is like spitting in the wind, I don't see it happening.
The light that once shined brightly inside is growing dim.
The hope I've had is getting thin.
When will I make it through?
Maybe someday I'll find again that look of love from a real man who's eyes will gleam like the stars in the sky.
His eyes will pierce my soul with love, with emotion that cannot be contained.
Who am I fooling?
No man could ever truly love me enough to stay,
No man could care enough to push through the rough patch.
Single seems to be what I'm made for.