"Are you okay?"

"Are you okay?"

What I don't say is how when sometimes the room gets so quiet, I'm scared people can hear the heart thumping so violently in my chest.
Or how I'm scared they can hear the harsh rapid breaths that kept getting stuck in my throat.
Or how I was choking on the oxygen filling my lungs which I was suffocating on since I couldn't figure out how to breathe.

It's funny how when the room gets the quietest I feel the loudest.
It's funny how I feel most in the way when I'm in the corner.

I don't say how I think I'm a burden on them, or how they shouldn't soften their tone when they speak to me.
Or how I wish they wouldn't treat me like glass.
Or how they shouldn't tread on eggshells around me.
Even if I was made of glass, I would've shattered a long time ago.

I start to feel stupid, like I'm in their way, like I'm getting on their nerves by just being there .
By wasting the oxygen by breathing.
By destroying a body I'm lucky to call my own.
By starving it, by cutting it, by bullying it in the mirror.

I start to feel like I should just go, it's stupid of me to stay anyways.

"Oh yeh I'm fine."