The room we used to sit in

The room we used to sit in


The room we used to sit in was filled with light, a glow so strong.
The room was a haven that we would paint and play in.
We'd make up stories that we knew we could never live with
but they were real in that room.  I could be a princess, a groom a superhero with you.
We would watch scary shows, scream and laugh together too.
I was always stronger there with you.

When the door swirls and closes I stare down at the floor
everything I've ever known with you is gone.
The light that filled the globes has flicked out and perished
but everything you've left in here still stands to flourish.
Your sweet scent mixed with sweat marinates in every pillow.
Like the rind of the fruit, it lingers with no purpose.
But flavours me with hope,  that you may come back to the room we used to sit in.
 
On the brown couch stained with glue and guilt
I sit in a pillow fort in need of rebuild. Wondering if you'll ever return
 To give me a lap to sit with. Your sin has piled up but you know I can forgive it
so sit with me once again in this room now damp and cold
Don’t pretend you aren't bold enough to return before I get too old.
I still hear the echoes of every shout and whimper
but your art on every wall holds on to the glimmer. You're now a painter with no brush, no
canvas and no paints. All you have is a dream in mind and an empty bank balance.
Just know they'll still be a spot on the carpet, we would lay on.

I've tried to stay strong hold on to my own hands
But the emptiness is a comma waiting for the next phrase to begin.
How can I move on when the room still smells like your perfume?
Your hand me downs are coated in it too. But you could smell different now and I wouldn't
 know. Because you don't even visit the room, we used to sit in.
 
Instead, I sit alone.  Watching reruns of your favourite series.
Tasting in the air the food you used to make,  Bake, or at least try to create.  
I still see you there playing games with me, laughing at every one of my jokes.
You'd cheat and roll the dice twice, but I wouldn't care
because I knew that you were sitting there on the floor we used to sit on,
covered in white dog fur.  Even when your drunken speech would slur I didn't really care
because at least you were there.  

The room we would sit in is now repainted, reconditioned
but they kept the carpet we would sit on. Like the room, you've changed.   You're more blue
and spite ridden too  but now I will live without your taboo. If we were in a series this would
be the end but maybe it will be renewed. Then I could still have hope knowing  when one
episode ends, another will begin In the room we used to sit in.

Now I'll sit in it with someone else,  but I'll still remember the lyrics we sang with the
windows open and I'll too remember every promise that was broken.
The alcohol soaked tears, The feuds and your beers.
I won't forget every insult and scream but as I pass your controller to someone else
I'll think of you, and hope that one day you'll come back
to the room we used to sit in.