Here I Will Rot

Once again I find myself wasting away,
Another restless night on a battered mattress, Stained with all the traumas and emotions of childhood,
If I were a poet I could find beauty in all of this,
Create art to be appreciated,
Have a legacy,
Yet I am not,
And I cannot,
So here I will rot

I will spew some words onto a page,
String them together in the hopes by some miracle I will create something,
Something to be proud of,
But to no surprise I am unable,
So here I will rot

 I think of love,
Such an alien feeling,
I think of hope,
Yet I cannot find it,
I think of myself,
Yet he has become a stranger,
I try to find inspiration,
Of course it is non-existent,
So here I will rot