Salvation

My arms are tired
But I must raise them higher than
my so-called brother

The lies of loving me
If I do what you say
If I hold my hands high enough
The pastor might look at me fondly

Men and women cry wired tears
With smiles on their faces
Frozen under my parents gaze,
I will myself to do the same

Please just look at me with love in your eyes
Without my church clothes on
Please just love me the way I am
Why must I scrub off my skin for you

How can you follow the one who condemns your son
I stand right in front of you but you won't see me

God said he'd love me if my family can't
But he made me unlovable
Unpure and ruined
"Cleanse yourself and you will be healed"
But I was born with rotten flesh

The lie of a cure
I've futilely searched for
He sent me to crawl on wounded knee
Promising the agony will be worth his grace

Scraping my skin over rock and sand
Untill no more blood is left
At last he reveals what I knew all along
I find my answer in death