I Want To.

I am lost and confused and astray
for a very long time I've been a stranger
for a very long time in my own home.
I am a prisoner. I sob & cry & weep
wishing to get myself: if at all, if I can
if at least using a manual.
If at all I can pick those shattered
pieces, scattered all over: my lost years.
If at all I can come back to me
the one I yearn for: my old self.
But it is late, it is too late for
I've lost myself. I am a dead worm
looking for holes to crumble in, even
when it rains, I revived not
I died. Yes I died even when I can
hear myself, my whispers, my thoughts.
I just want to go, escape this world
I want to escape. I want to leave this world.
Maybe, maybe, maybe when I reincarnated
I would love myself and the world.
maybe I wouldn't wish to die. Maybe
I would want to live life.