The Mountains Make Us Seem Smallish

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/164644/the-mountains-make-us-seem-smallish

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  AIDA

  I absolutely loved your poem 'The Mountains Make Us Seem Smallish'. Your rich, descriptive language really paints a beautiful, vivid image of the Swiss mountains in the reader's mind. The serene atmosphere so beautifully described really does make the reader feel small. Your exploration of man's humble position in front of nature's grandeur is truly soul-soothing. The evocative phrases used, such as 'God's grandeur is told', 'eagle's high path', and 'window lanterns bring', effectively transport the readers to the serene setting. This is testament to your incredible skill as a poet.
  
  On the side of improvement, although your poem is beautiful as it is, perhaps try incorporating more poetic devices such as similes and metaphors, to create a deeper comparison and enhance the richness of your imagery. In your second stanza, the rhythm appears to falter a bit, try to ensure that all your lines have a consistent rhythm and metric pattern to ensure a smoother reading experience. Also, perhaps consider sharpening your dialogue skills by incorporating vivid character conversation in the narrative; this will add more dynamism to your poetic rendition.
  
  All in all, your poem is truly well-written, touching on such profound themes that resonate with many. You have a wonderful ability to depict beautiful landscapes through your words. It's exciting to see what you'll create next! more »

  LikeReply9 months ago