1:21 pm

I’m envious of Europe
because it gets your devotion and attention
meanwhile I’m miserable in California
I’m envious of that whole damn country
that’s making you forget about me
I don’t know if I’m even still what you want
I’m jealous of exclusive Dutch wine
that gets to be on strawberry gloss lips that should be on mine
I’m upset that the airy weather gets to hold you in the exact way I want to
I’m waking up in the morning
it’s 10 pm where you are
you haven’t called because you’re with your new university friends downtown at some new bar
do you tell them about the boy you had to leave behind?
that we were in love, or did it slip your mind?
all those parties must’ve taken my spot in that special place where your heart is
you must have lost your phone because it’s been two days since I heard from you at all
though you didn’t lose social media since you’re still posting
I hope one day I’ll be strong enough to turn off your notifications
you got on a train and it took you away
leaving your whole life behind
moving on to be your own person
and no longer wanting to be mine