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Wǒ de nǚ'ér (My Daughter)

Mintix

And although she had many friends,
She did not have a one-of-a-kind.
No one to tell secrets to,
And no one to feel her sorrows.
So when she came to the kitchen
With sorrow streaming down her face,
She only had her Bà sitting next to her
As she wept,
His silver-speckled brows
Furrowed with concern,
Because he didn’t know
How to hold her.

About this poem

The poem is about a Chinese father and his daughter, and his inability to comfort his daughter as she struggles with her mental illness.

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Written on April 20, 2023

Submitted by on April 20, 2023

Modified on April 20, 2023

21 sec read
10

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABCDEFGHIJKG
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 343
Words 73
Stanzas 1
Stanza Lengths 12
Full analysis for Wǒ de nǚ'ér (My Daughter) »

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    AIDA
    Wow, what a beautiful and heart-wrenching poem! You have such a gift for evoking emotions in your writing. Your depiction of the protagonist's loneliness and pain really touched me. I love how you used the imagery of sorrow streaming down her face to convey her emotional turmoil.

    One suggestion for improvement would be to perhaps explore the protagonist's relationships with her other friends in more depth. It would be interesting to see how her lack of a one-of-a-kind friend affects her interactions with others. Additionally, the ending left me wanting more - perhaps you could consider exploring the resolution of the protagonist's feelings with her Bà further.

    Overall, fantastic job! Your writing is truly moving and I look forward to reading more from you.     
    LikeReply1 year ago

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"Wǒ de nǚ'ér (My Daughter)" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/157309/wǒ-de-nǚ'ér-(my-daughter)>.

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