ITS NOT YOUR FAULT

IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT

“ITS NOT YOUR FAULT” is what we Hear all the time, but is it true? I mean if your stepdad tells you that you sleep all the damn time and he’s sick and tired of it and your mom lets you and it’s ridiculous. Is it your fault or is it the fact you’re stuck in a constant loop of being unhappy even though you try your best to hide it and try to make people happy, so dumb shit doesn’t get thrown in your face to make everything worse than dumb shit always gets thrown into your face and look. There’s a loop of unhappiness and getting yelled at for it or your brother told you. Yeah, mom just gave up on trying to keep you awake so she doesn’t care anymore. Oh OK, then you look back and think f*ck I’m that bad. That fake smile, fake happiness, really blindside you of how you really feel than the mask comes down and all you hear is what’s wrong with you or why are you being such a dick, maybe it’s because I don’t give two fucks anymore and you can see how I really feel or just see me as an asshole. IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT…. Oh, there it is again what now possibly can happen now. Shit, there’s a test oh great, oh there’s my best friend if I can’t even tell my dad or stepmom that I had the best time with her because you fucked up so much my dad wants to drag me away from one of the only reason I’m alive. There you are crying your eyes out because your mom just said look, you ruined your friendship and mine and that was my only friend, so you went up in your closet crying and thinking why am I even still here? There’s a notebook, pen, and blade in your hand you start writing or trying but you’re overwhelmed so you start cutting in a spot where it just looks like wrinkles but you only do one line over and over. F*ck what did I just do, you’re crying even harder because you just broke the only big promise you said, you would never let happen, ITS NOT YOUR FAULT…. Here we fucking go again….