Haunted

What's it like? One of the most common.
It distorts, it haunts, it leaves you feeling lost.
A Neverending and waking nightmare. The fear and worry makes you lose your sanity, makes you lose sight of your own reality.
What is anxiety?
It's being afraid of your own mind you can never find any relief.
It's being haunted by your dreams.
When the drugs and therapy don't work, and you don't know who you are. You don't know if you belong, a constant thought of, "Do they hate me?"
Not knowing if the ones you love really love you back.
Everyday brings more confusion more distortion, your own mind feeding you lies, so you turn to habits. Wanting to change but being afraid of it, wanting to chase the adrenaline but you can't find it. You can't turn off your thoughts and can never rest or find peace. So you take their word for it, you start living cause you don't care, or you don't want to. Feeling like a cry baby, everyone always asking, "Are you ok?" And when it starts you don't know how to stop it. Wondering if you'll ever get past it. But it doesn't matter, you just lie and say you're fine. I mean there's no logical reason not to be. Constantly masking it all away trapped in a cycle, a cyclone of emotions pours out out of you and sometimes you just want to scream. And when it rains you're happy, when it rains you're sad, when it rains you're mad. The clouds above your head you can't see the light wondering if it's night. How is this right? How are you alive? They suffer, you suffer, we all just always suffer. There's no hope, no peace, no end in sight. How can we live like this? We're all doomed, trapped in a repetitious world of lies and schemes set up to control what little free will we have left. And it burns
And it drowns
And it takes and takes and takes.
We will never be in control.
So now everytime I close my eyes I see the waves of blinding light, I want out of this neighborhood I don't belong here, everything is so dark here.
Well I just want it all to go away cause I can't deal with all this pain.
Searching for a better year, I try not to shed a tear.
I'm scared at every corner.
Can't tell the difference of the holidays and someone dead.
Waiting for the light of day.