EXs

I cant forget, as I will always remember
Hating August, Longing for September,
Promising dreams without foundations,
People building walls of contradictions,
I wasn’t allowed to develop before we met,
But now losing you is my biggest regret.

Going from a straight jacket to freedom,
I wasn't allowed to learn about life,
Had to spend my heads in books and navigation Pythagoras theorem,
That's why bumping into you meant so much strife,
Working out what a relationship meant as we went along,
My heart wanting to be with you, but everyday but my upbringing telling me it was wrong

Before meeting you, I should have checked my mental health
As being with you, meant more than having wealth
I made so many wrong decisions and choices,
I shouldn't have given weight to the with the disapproving voices,
I shouldn't have ran off on you on holiday,
I should have read your journal and understood the characteristics you wanted me to display.

Once in a while I wonder what ifs and look you up on Facebook,
I see a daughter and wonder what would it be like if she was mine,
Wishing sometimes life had a different outlook,
As my rose tinted glasses will always have you as perfect and divine,
But unfortunately I can not let my dreams forever overrule reality,
My head knows we were never meant to be.