Sentiments to my mother

Feels like you've been gone forever
But I know you're  by my side
You've joined a legion of angels
And I suppose you've learnt to glide
You've probably met the christ
And in his work abide
I imagine you talking to God
And filling him with pride
But it feels like you've been gone forever
Some people think of suicide
But I realise life is now or never
And me jumping ship early would just be a guise
I think of who I'll leave behind
And all our loving ties
But it feels like you've been gone so long
I've forgotten the shape of your eyes
And it was precious to live beside you
If only for a few decades
You were always around no matter the pressures
I wish you could give me the answers to my dying questions
Because they leave me puzzled more than I can mention
You were the main one whom I seeked attention from
But I had to get used to you being gone