Commodity

I don’t just want to be a commodity for satiating your urges.

I want to be someone you can’t live without

I want you to need me with every fiber of your being, to not know what you did without me before we were together

To be physically changed forever just by being with me

I want to know that I have purpose with you

Wake up and my eyes are wet, been crying in my dreams again.

Fear of seeing its true
Fear of seeing her and you
Another gained up on couple of ex factors
Holding me and punching me in the stomach
Be it physically or mentally it is real to me
Fear of seeing this all too real
The replacement embraced with you
The betrayers who used to say trust me
My love who once held me in embrace
Told me everything would be ok
Said to me lovingly my Lyric
All is gone now?
But can I bear seeing it?
I can’t
The funeral killed me
I did however endure
Gritting my teeth for grandmas ghost
To be there for her even through this enduring pain
It kills my soul
It damages me
It rips me to shreds
And you compare me to your drunk uncle
But I don’t drink
He lost his wife
But not like this
Not where poly claimed I wouldn’t see you walk away from me to her forever
Not where my kids stay with her forever with me exiled
Who do you think you are
Killing your wife, day to day
So casually
Who does she think she is
Still attacking me to this day
And you still don’t see it
And you never will.
And still I mourn
What I know was ours
That they can never take away
That should have never faded
Our kids suffer
I suffer
Loss