Why Do I Care?

Why do I still miss you?
None of the promises we made ever came true.
Everything we ever built, eventually, fell through.
Our problems never fixed themselves. It’s all nothing new.
So, why do I still miss you?

Why do I care where you are?
Why can’t I figure out how to love from afar.
Why do I check your Snapchat to see you with other guys at bars?
Why can’t I cut off all ties and heal my own scars?
Why do I care where you are?

Why do I care who you’re with?
When I wanted to keep trying, you wanted to quit.
I spent the last half of this romance feeling like shit.
My favorite parts about myself, you just didn’t get.
So why do I care who you’re with?

Why do I need you to miss me?
Was it ever that great, if I’m thinking honestly?
Why am I obsessed with making you see
that you made a mistake when you decided to leave?
Why do I need you to miss me?

Why can’t I just let you go?
Why can’t I let my heart break and let my tears flow?
Living in your memory’s shadow won’t allow me to grow.
Maybe I’ll never love this hard again. I honestly don’t know.
But why can’t I just let you go?

Why do I need to be loved?
Why do I always treat men like a drug?
Why do I put myself down below and them, up above?
And when it doesn’t work out I just drag myself through the mud.
So, why do I need to be loved?

Why haven’t I ever loved me?
Why can’t I ever see what everyone else sees?
Why can’t I escape self-hate and codependency?
If I created the chains, can’t I break myself free?
It’s time to start loving me.