Awakening

I had a dream
this world was suffocating.
So I tried to leave it,
just make myself scarce,
like "Billy the kid".
But now I wake to see
it is impossible to skip town.
As soon as you drive away
from the frontier,
you're right back
where you left off.
"sorry, kid, gotta' keep going",
there is no cutting to the end.
Wish I could join you forever,
but you looked back
and I was pulled
into the black tar of today.
Maybe one day we'll line up
Maybe one day we'll escape the trap.
Until we meet again,
Sorina

I was awake.
Now fully.
But the terrifying feeling of awareness had settled in prior to my awakening.
I knew I'd done the "unspoken of"
And worst
I'd failed at it.
And, if before I was chest-deep
In the black tar,
It had now swallowed me whole.
But I also discovered something else
In the thick and heavy tar:
I discovered courage.
Courage that I hadn't known
Lay inside me.
Like a minuscule,
Yet of unquestionable worth
Sand-rock of gold.