The Great Uproar

When my mind runs like a racecar, I never knew what to do...how to say it, or when is my time to settle the clutter.  The clutter is like a closet filled with guilds of teeny tiny dust bunnies. Unlike any other time, I felt like my time was ticking like it didn't matter what my heart felt about being successful. Success for me was not a degree not a name on plague, not putting my name on a paper... You see life isn't about that at all. I asked myself what do I want out of this life? Is it Independence? Is it creativity to another realm? Life isn't always about the things that make us happy but the things that make us who we are. I know I'm not perfect nobody is. But what makes our success is truly why our being is being just who we are... We can't always rely on everyone that walks into my life because people have their problems.  I may have this all under control sometimes... but sometimes life can just be a plain old struggle some days you don't see the sun. But today the light came on no more troubling issues; can that be my destiny where I'm supposed to be? Can rock bottom sinking lead to the Successful person I can want to be? The patterns of a society where if you aren't "normal" it's just not cool nobody is.,? So why put all this pressure on ourselves to be perfect? The perfect whatever... I'm at peace with me myself and I. No one to judge me only the universe tells me so. If this life isn't what it's supposed to be then I have to do what makes me happy, not others. I may have flaws but who doesn't, only I call the shots in this life, not anyone else...No one can tell me how to handle my stress. Stress leads to confusion; confusion leads to only a big puddle of mud.  Mud feels good when a plant is being planted, but mud in your brain is like an internal fog that doesn't go away.