My Happiness

What is it?
They call it happiness
But I wonder what it is?
Is it that peace?
that lies in cherishing the crowd
or is it the fame of the effort,
that shattered you to pieces?
Is it your being a busy state?
Or does it ever join you?
when you are sitting numb,
in the comfort of your couch
I wonder will it ever greet me
when I am self-satisfied,
when I have won,
what I yearned for all these years
when I have my people to applaud it with me
but what if "it" is late even then.
I get fearful thoughts at times,
What if I fail to recognize it?
in the huge swarm of despairs
This is why I want to know you,
to know what you've got for me
what it will be,
That would make me happy.