seasons of grief

There are days that I move through the day and I think everything is ok,
there are days that I can barely pull myself up and function.
most days i wear a mask, a facade that no one can see through
then know one has to see the pain inside
but when the night comes the heaviness sets in
like the mist across the cold starry sky
that's when the pain is released
Like pandora's box of emotion
when I am alone and there is no one to talk to
when there is no one around
That's when I remember that you are no longer here.
no longer just a phone call away
I still feel you at times
like a whisper in the wind
the rustle of the leaves.
i hear laughter and remember,
the sweet sound of your voice
the joy on your face
oh how it would radiate like the first morning sun
the warm hugs that enveloped
wrapped warm like an old favorite sweater
As time passes it will get easier, I'm told
the memories will turn sweet
like the smell of flowers in the spring after the rains
but for now it still hurts
feeling like the frost biting on an ice cold winter's night
the cold that buries itself in you
making you shiver to the core.
wishing for the summer warmth you rememberd
where you were close
when you were here and you were home