Words Do Hurt

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me"

She liked to believe, that someone had good intentions when they made this rhyme, as a child her mother and teachers had recited it a thousand times.

She understood the concept and how to a young child could easily be calmed with such a catchy phrase but she on the other hand had found this to be wrong unfortunately in a million different ways.

At first it was the bullying, the rude remarks and rumors that weren't true, she'd go home crying everyday her mom was always ready it was nothing new.

Later in life the bullying halted, the unkind words stopped for a bit but she believed those things about herself her mind was tired, her soul became exhausted.

As an adult she made peace with her past, what had happened was wrong but she didn't want to dwell. Besides she had just met this new guy and it was going so well.

Always in the back of her mind only loud enough for her to hear it, was this little voice reminding her of how little she meant to others, anything to break her spirit.

That guy she met became her husband and she quickly conceived their first daughter. Things were fine at first but then the stress of life set in and his show of demons was about to begin.

It started with commands, made into simple requests if you will, a "fold those clothes here and wash the dishes there" it didn't seem to be a big deal.

Then suddenly without warning the levee, it broke. What were once just simple requests turned into her being made into a joke. His words cut her like a knife, and she'd rise after every blow. Staggering to recover after every scene, remaining upright and silent against his unforgiving words, knowing there is no way in hell she could ever stoop so low.

She holds on tight to her little girls, burying her face into their silky hair, trying to cover their ears when he begins to yell knowing that even though she's built her armor, their spirit was her responsibility, this wasn't their  burden, it was only hers to bear.

She likes to try to remember where she heard the rhyme first, because the moments that came after were something like a curse.
With every possible scenario she plans her escape, for now she holds up her shield and calms her mind knowing now she has to wait. She will never give up fighting for the respect she knows she deserves, right now is her moment she thinks as a shadow rises just beyond the curb, she throws the car into gear and never slows down even with the fear locked in his eyes, she doesn't even swerve.

She closes her eyes as the steam settles and takes a deep breath, tonight's the night she ended it, she turns the ignition leaving those memories to the dead.